The Rules of Attraction - scouting female subjectivity

While living as a female and excercising this female role in Society, I would find it extremely hard to relate to "other females" no wonder... 

I struggled for relatedness and finding my " female self " which im sure, lies inside everyone of us, however mine seemed to be pretty fucking burried in the bassement. 

Perceived as a female who is sexually attracted to " other females" one cannot escape falling into the lesbian category, definetely something i was never trully fond of. But at least I can understand them... I thought, after all I´m " one of them" at least i tried to convince myself, I was. 

I used to believe that it must be easier to get close to a woman as a man than it actually is as a woman. Fuck, was I terribly wrong... those days, I have encountered nothing but the opposite, although I never related to most females and never really had a bunch of "girlfriends" to meet up with , go to the movies, buying clothes, museums and what this and what not... I do sense a huge difference in the way I was treated before and the way I am treated now. 

They still talk to you, smile, hold eye contact of course. But they always seem to be in this constant state of alert or seem wary of you ... as if they think all you wanna do is get in their pants and you are probably just disguising it with something else. 

They are probably right 80% of the times, but what happens to the 20% left when you are just trying to be friendly and actually mean it ? Now a little about genitalia, its funny how phallocratic our culture is and how culturally ritualized a cock can be, however, one learns very fast that the true power actually lies in the shifting opening and closing of a vagina´s labia minora. 

Yeah, they got this thing you want and they know you want it. They will only give it to you when they want it though, cause you are the one who is supposed to be always "ready" and thats another expectation you must fulfill. 

Testosterone doesn´t make things any easier... the longing for physical contact is definitely more intense than it used to be before, and its actually annoying. One beggins to understand how prostitution has always been there since earlier civilizations... you pay - fuck - cum and leave and get this physical contact without all the bullshit and games that usually come allong with it.

To me there´s more to it though, even when it´s only just sex, I need a thrill or some sort of challenge or purpose, It almost feels like hunting or when snakes eat mice, they have to kill their prey by themselves or else they won´t eat it. 

I suppose having been socialized as female most of my life and having had access to these "female backstage-onstage" social scenarios, does give me an advantage over bio males for deeper understanding in some of their behaviour, however elusive it might be. I can identify some of the usual codes and a general modus operandi  that most of them share. 

The Asshole - it´s an all times favourite amongst the ones with a low self esteem and the perpetuators of a " macho man " type who treats them like shit just to have a reason to complain about it afterwards. The Asshole also calls other type of women´s attention, not only those with low self esteem but on the parallels of self esteem, the self assured woman. 

Why would the self assured, probably smart woman be drawn into The Asshole  type ? 

Because either they want to change him and turn him into a more likeable asshole, a task that proves challenging but there is almost nothing a self assured woman´s ego can´t achieve - Or simply because they also crave to be treated like shit deep inside without admitting it. 

Mr Nice -  A total success, If you want to be stepped on, used, abused and recycled even just to repeat the previous sequence once more. Mr Nice - represents no danger, its the final encarnation of all the bullshit talk about how they long for stability and " something special " But what do you do once you´ve found your holly grial? You gotta make up another one! the key here is to keep longing or complaining about that which you "cant find".

The Gentleman - A rare kind that is almost going to extinction, cause it doesn´t pay off to be Clark Gable these days. The gentleman knows 90% of the times what he wants and how he wants it, he shows himself as he is , not more and not less than that - there are no hidden agendas but yet it doesn´t mean he´ll reveal every single detail of his life. The gentleman can both be gentle and after all... be a man,  he can go from attentive and gentle to disappearing for a while for no reason. This is a perfect blend for many, however, The Gentleman  tends to be mistaken by the self assured woman for Mr Nice even when he isn´t.

The Pussyhagen-  My own term to depict how most men in Copenhagen seem to be ( its all in general scales) 80´s hair , tighter jeans than lady gaga´s underwear, usually skinny and with a very supervised "careless" look. Some of them go with big purses even, they are also "sensitive" and support causes - commonly related to the trendy ones nowadays- Its hot to save the world , from the comfort of economical stability. The Pussyhagen  seems to be fairly succesful both with the self assured women and even the low self esteem ones, this is because most of the times he is also The Asshole in a more stylized version so it takes the self assured woman longer time to figure that out. Another reason why The Pussyhagen seems to be a hit, is that most women in my opinion suffer from what I like to call The Cylindrical Pussy Syndrome

 Cylindrical Pussy Syndrome =  a total femme with a penis 


It appears to me that some of them  want another "girlfriend" with a penis. 


In all these typologies i find myself more inclined to The Gentleman type with some shades of sexual expression alla boogie nights. Say it always like it is , and if it isn´t.... keep it to yourself.